r/wallstreetbets 9h ago

Meme Can't make this shit up he even included the stock ticker

Post image
39.5k Upvotes

1.8k comments sorted by

u/OSRSkarma Flipping at the Grand Exchange 9h ago edited 9h ago

I will reluctantly leave this up because the dude is literally pumping tickers.

This doesn’t mean fucking post every little thing he says for fuck sake…

FDs or bust

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1.2k

u/Skeleton-ear-face 9h ago

SEC sleeping on this sh*t show of manipulation

797

u/Regenbooggeit 9h ago

They’re not sleeping lmao. They’re allowing it.

182

u/Canadian_Border_Czar 8h ago

Not just allowing it, theyre hunting for people that seem to know but arent in the super secret chat.

21

u/Horskr 6h ago

Brought to you by Signal.

Maybe they'll invite a Wall Street Journal reporter to this one.

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71

u/Mindless-Mulberry404 8h ago

They just dont care, the SEC has been gutted

25

u/AidenTai 8h ago

Not like they can do anything to a president. That would be the perrogative of congress if an impeachment goes through. The SEC is there for everyone *but* those with immunity.

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23

u/Richard587 8h ago

sec probably pumping pltr themselves rn

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9.6k

u/HolyBubbiDiver 9h ago

Sir, this is a circus

1.6k

u/WarmShine4062 8h ago

363

u/GaK_Icculus fly 🦅s fly 8h ago

299

u/RecentDecision2329 8h ago

51

u/Bosworth02 8h ago

What the hell is this!?! You can actually make out his little bald old man head in his wispy cotton candy hair!

150

u/tomgreen99200 7h ago

33

u/Bosworth02 7h ago

It’s insane how perfect that is!

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u/jct23502 8h ago

Sir this is a Wendy's.... Side note, is that where the 3.50 bjs are being handled? By the dumpster?

19

u/Logandes 8h ago

No, thats at Tacos Tacos Tacos, ask for Terry

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16

u/Fedora_Million_Ankle 8h ago

How the fuck did you get in my office

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18

u/bobombpom 7h ago

Who the FUCK is putting the condiments between the lettuce and the patty?

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223

u/Sec2727 9h ago

Barron’s Fidelity Account: +1.8 Million

35

u/Claybuch 8h ago

Billion*

32

u/BackgroundFruits 8h ago

And most of it is probably in 0DTE options.

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639

u/Dear-Ad6139 9h ago

Right? We elected the best clown out there for our circus! People don't seem to appreciate it.

284

u/BobbywiththeJuice 9h ago

IF YOU CANT HANDLE ME AT MY BOZO YOU DONT DESERVE ME AT MY BEZOS

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48

u/FartingWithStyle 8h ago

Living in a circus isn’t as good as visiting one.

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81

u/No-Phrase-4692 9h ago

Really the best, numbers we’ve never seen before levels

55

u/FreakyFranklinBill 9h ago

a circus, the likes of which we have never seen before. strong, grown men came up to me with tears in their eyes, from laughing or crying i don't know.

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139

u/TomatoSpecialist6879 Paper Trading Competition Winner 9h ago

There were bulls who voted for him because he's "good for market stability" btw lmfao

33

u/cantadmittoposting Airline Aficionado ✈️ 8h ago

i can understand kangaroos voting for this shit

8

u/GoldenAura16 8h ago

Wait....do even the charts read upside down in Australia?

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13

u/Initial_Ad_9250 8h ago

Well he's good for market volatility

25

u/TomatoSpecialist6879 Paper Trading Competition Winner 8h ago

He's good for cowboy traders, vol scalpers, and gamblers in general, but other than that he's been dog shit for the market. Index funds have pretty much been range bound since start of Oct and losing to inflation

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37

u/behindgreeneyez 9h ago

I got the circus but no bread

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20

u/brumbarosso 9h ago

Psycho circus, like the old game

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480

u/LightOverWater 9h ago

DJT: need exit liquidity

281

u/DataCassette 9h ago

Exit liquidity is what the diaper is for

30

u/Wrong_Armadillo_4166 8h ago

Take my upvote and get out.

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7.9k

u/NoQuarterChicken 9h ago

what are laws, really?

2.1k

u/CaptainSilverVEVO 9h ago

A concept? A suggestion? Just a word on a piece of paper he can't even read?

845

u/Square_Radiant 9h ago

A succulent Chinese meal?

290

u/PrincipleProof6374 8h ago

Democracy manifest

52

u/No-Locksmith6983 8h ago

RIP to him and that succulent chinese meal 🙏🏾

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31

u/No_Tree_8144 9h ago

always been a suggestion for the rich boss. they exist for us peasant losers tho

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246

u/Astro51450 8h ago

Laws are for the poors

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154

u/Angry_argie 9h ago

If the punishment is a fine, they're privileges.

40

u/xyzzy321 8h ago

There won't even be a punishment because some people are above laws and have been their entire lives

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116

u/DownwardSpirals 8h ago

Well, here in the US, you are guilty until proven wealthy. Hope that helps!

7

u/Witte-666 6h ago

Sounds accurate for most countries

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25

u/gunfirinmaniac 9h ago

Something something librul invention

19

u/Momoselfie 8h ago

A system for controlling the peasants

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4.1k

u/royalty1116 9h ago edited 5h ago

"Hello, SEC, are you seeing this?"

4.0k

u/No-Phrase-4692 9h ago

SEC: “Yeah we’re pumping too bro don’t worry”

462

u/adv23 9h ago

“No homo”

86

u/MantisShrimpUpTop 8h ago

What’re you doing, SEC-bro?

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127

u/No-Phrase-4692 9h ago

Speak for yourself

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53

u/HogmanDaIntrudr 8h ago

“SEC, brought to you by Palantir”

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89

u/Square_Radiant 9h ago

I have this thought every two days since Jan 25 - maybe if he wasn't a billionaire and said "I like the stock", they'd quickly make an issue out of it

26

u/lordofming-rises 9h ago

Hes not a cat though.

54

u/Ill-Mousse-3817 8h ago

Lol, the fact that there is the SEC didn't even come to my mind after reading the tweet. They really managed to become irrelevant

11

u/Red-Star-44 6h ago

If you ever think you are useless just remember sec exists

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67

u/Momoselfie 8h ago

SEC was always there just to protect the rich

77

u/Any-Tennis4658 8h ago

100%. They really showed their hand with the GameStop market manipulation. Straight up ordered brokers to block the poors from buying. It's all a scam.

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12

u/ShillinTheVillain 8h ago

Your call has been forwarded to an automated voicemail system

"Donald J Trump"

is not available. Please leave a message after the tone. If you would like to leave a callback number, press 1

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27

u/CohibaBob 8h ago

Is this SEC in the room with us now?

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4.1k

u/Iunatic 9h ago

LMFAO

782

u/PM_ME_FIREFLY_QUOTES 9h ago

Party Iraq is in the house tonight?

293

u/xLabrinthx 8h ago

inside traders just have a good time

83

u/DrBoomTube 8h ago

And we gon’ make the stock rise tonight

33

u/whoknowsifimjoking 7h ago

Everybody just have a lewd time

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37

u/PayneTrain181999 8h ago

Everyday I’m pumping!

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112

u/StickyNebbs 8h ago

bro what are we doing LOOOOOL

39

u/HammerAndSickleBot 7h ago

Said it before, but it's the same thing he did in 2020 and mods and the finance bros are all acting surprised. He literally trotted out business CEO's during his covid briefings and had them say how great their companies were and that stocks should go back up. They had the MyPillow CEO telling Americans they need to get back to work so stocks could go brrrrr.

I'm kind of shocked how many people think this is the first time. We knew this before the 2024 primaries even.

28

u/oltronn 5h ago

So pissed every time I hear about someone making it sound like he’s finally showing his true colours. No! This is what he has been doing all along, he has been a openly retarded narcissistic bully from the start.

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48

u/LimpAd4924 8h ago

Free advertisement for Peter Thiel

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57

u/Neat-Beautiful-5505 8h ago

Was the Iran War just to test the Palantir technology in real world situation? Cause it seems like it was.

26

u/giga_lord3 7h ago

No shit. Why do you think isreal is so important to these goons? They get to use their military and biometric surveillance technology without any oversight or regulations.

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2.1k

u/Hungry-for-Apples789 9h ago

Here it is.

307

u/mvearthmjsun 7h ago

It has barely moved from this. I hope all the insider traders stay broke.

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292

u/beatlz-too 8h ago

so time to buy?

562

u/SupremeWizardry 8h ago

You think a cia backed ai shadow surveillance company just gonna quietly wind down and disappear in today’s age?…

Me neither, long at 20 bucks and maybe adding more if it continues to drop.

432

u/butt_shrecker 8h ago

Idk if it is a good long term buy. The company is so toxic a political change could nuke it.

321

u/Late-Combination5060 8h ago

Good thing we live in an oligarchy...

154

u/butt_shrecker 8h ago

I'm making the active choice to believe things will get better.

21

u/snopro387 7h ago

Betting on things to get better might be the worst bet I’ve seen in WSB actually

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139

u/Competitive-Truth675 8h ago

by buying in i'm ensuring it

109

u/Late-Combination5060 8h ago

Puts on this guys freedoms 

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25

u/Redditauro 6h ago

That's the most beautiful thing I've seen this week. 

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2.7k

u/SilberBackApe 9h ago

So puts on PLTR because he wants to take profits

1.8k

u/DisappointedSkeletor 9h ago

nah this is Thiel panicking

Trump did the same for Elon a year ago

624

u/JSTootell 9h ago

It's all computer!

210

u/NextSouceIT 8h ago

Everything is computer!

15

u/RUNNING-HIGH 8h ago

Nothing bad can happen it can only good happen!

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84

u/Megadum 8h ago

Thank you for the needed lol. I almost forgot about this genius statement

45

u/Someredditskum 8h ago

Tesler!

21

u/IEatDipsForDinner 7h ago

We love Tesler!

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98

u/PeopleRFuckingDumb 9h ago

Yes then he dumped Musk like a turd

94

u/Nruggia 8h ago

I get the feeling the turd couldn't read the room and needed a punch in the face to get the message

23

u/swenau01 8h ago

Wasn’t it Bessent who punched him?

25

u/Totesnotskynet 8h ago

Old gay dude whipped Elmo’s ass

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u/MantisShrimpUpTop 8h ago

I maintain he punched himself for attention from Daddy because it was his last day.

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u/Waiting4Reccession 8h ago

Trump did not write this tweet.

One of his many handlers did it, you can tell from him using the word "technologies" and the style of it in general

23

u/EditRemove 8h ago

That doesn't change anything.

Trump hires and fires the people who manage these accounts. If he didn't approve the message, he would say something.

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u/Hoessay 8h ago

it can only good happen

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u/No-Phrase-4692 9h ago

Puts on PLTR because you’re a decent human being

69

u/foodank012018 9h ago

That would mean not profiting from any of this bullshit. Buy or sell, puts or calls, if you're making money from this chaos you are part of this chaos.

105

u/ChocolateMalawi 9h ago

Well ya, moral superiority doesn’t pay the mortgage

40

u/Big-Farmer-2192 8h ago

You're right. And I hate it.

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u/Mavnas 9h ago

Fair, but if you buy PLTR puts, you can at least root for the failure of all this BS without being conflicted.

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u/Agile_Statistician39 9h ago

Or he knows you’d think that and selling you naked puts.

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1.9k

u/Vortep1 9h ago

No market manipulation here. Now back to work!

126

u/movealongnowpeople 9h ago

Move along now people. Nothing to see here.

184

u/Visible_Double9101 8h ago

37

u/PayneTrain181999 8h ago

If the fries were put in the bag they wouldn’t be all over the floor

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u/hungry4nuns 8h ago

He’s basically a glorified influencer at this stage. “Hi guys I just wanted to give a shout out to my favourite brand Palantir and my cute little nickname for them PLTR (kinda like the stock name lol). And before you ask, no this is not a paid promotion I just really like their products and they’re a really trustworthy brand so I wanted to share them with my followers”

17

u/HammerAndSickleBot 7h ago

Have questions? Check in with today's sponsor GrokAI. Grok has the answers you need, with FinDom prompts you can afford. Try it today and get 10% off your next order of AG1. But wait, there's more! Open an account with GrokInvest today and receive 10,000 Grok dollars absolutely free - that's a $10 value, at no cost to you.

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u/default_token 8h ago

Yeah this is just an official act of the president. You can tell because of the way it is

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u/__nameless____ 9h ago

Looks like someone from pltr actually has access to this account lmao

10

u/GI-Robots-Alt 3h ago

Let's be so for real here. You can't convince me he knows a single one of his passwords, or how to find them without help. I'd be shocked if there weren't half a dozen people with access to his account.

I'd have to see it with my own eyes to believe he's capable of making a box of Kraft Dinner for fuck sake.

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u/Busta_Memes 9h ago

60

u/PAYPAL_ME_10_DOLLARS 8h ago

This dude donated 500 at the easter announcements

28

u/Acceptable-You-6953 7h ago

It seems dumb at first glance but only because it didn’t work. If it did we’d really only be surprised it was that cheap of a bribe

631

u/No-Phrase-4692 9h ago

Can someone make an ETF of Retruth Trades? (NYSE: RTRD)

13

u/OutdoorsNSmores 7h ago

I don't have time to keep up with his insane barrage of statements - but I have thought that someone watching could do well, very well because he know all about grass. He owns a lot of grass, a lot of GREEN grass.

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431

u/Fantastic-Zucchini82 9h ago

In perfect world, everyone would sell that shit after tweets like this one lmao

168

u/SexySmexxy 8h ago

it actually is down LMAO

36

u/PIE_OF_LIFE64 6h ago

It's down because Michael burry said he is shorting it

39

u/AutoModerator 6h ago

Michael Burry responded to my craigslist ad looking for someone to mow my lawn. "$30 is $30", he said as he continued to mow what was clearly the wrong yard. My neighbor and I shouted at him but he was already wearing muffs. Focused dude. He attached a phone mount onto the handle of his push mower. I was able to sneak a peek and he was browsing Zillow listings in central Wyoming. He wouldn't stop cackling.

That is to say, Burry has his fingers in a lot of pies. He makes sure his name is in all the conversations.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

82

u/TopKekBoi69 8h ago

Down 1.6% rn at least, but wish it would go to $0

33

u/heikici 8h ago

Careful or Karp is gonna send a drone with fentanyl -laced urine after u

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25

u/Late-Combination5060 8h ago

This would be the only defense to market manipulation, can't tell if he's trying to make it go up or down by mentioning it. Obviously he wants it to go up but they really can't afford an influencer? 

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281

u/Shoganai_Hito 9h ago

His buddies need their calls to print obviously

41

u/Angstianssi 8h ago

Theyre all holding bags and he needs to fix it somehow.

23

u/CynicInRehab 8h ago

it didn't even go up lmao

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u/knoqd_ 9h ago

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u/vegetaman 9h ago

Are ya winning son?

51

u/[deleted] 9h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

36

u/HammerAndSickleBot 9h ago

The boy's a genius!

120

u/No-Professionalfj 9h ago

97

u/ana_log_ue 8h ago

No need to insult people with Downs like that

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u/Kage_Bushin 9h ago

Are we sure we ain't stuck in a Simpsons episode?

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u/[deleted] 9h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

138

u/South-Attorney-5209 9h ago

Is this a fucking ad for a ticker by POTUS wtf clown show is this

24

u/rbad8717 8h ago

Daily adverts from the US president. Yesterday it was Stake

8

u/KarmaCommando_ 4h ago

"wtf clown show is this"

Sir do you have any idea where and when you are right now

284

u/mikeysz 9h ago

Just ask that school in Iran.

30

u/Soaked4youVaporeon 7h ago

Remember when people were calling that fake and that Iran actually bombed the school?

Then the US said they did it and those people wen dead silent 

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u/Cherry_Springer_ 8h ago

"It was next to a military base!" yeah then maybe don't bomb the area while school is in session... or, you know, at all

27

u/alanxloh 8h ago

And that same group of people were mad that Iran did a targeted attack on Israel’s iron dome (which did precisely hit its target) which they intentionally placed in between a bunch of high rise residential buildings.

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u/The_Patocrator_5586 9h ago

Pure market manipulation

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u/Lanky_Commercial9731 9h ago

Idk Palantir didn t really help with Hormuz, so puts I guess

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u/Sufficient-Skill9530 9h ago

The grift must flow. 

87

u/breakevencloud 9h ago

Something-something, an “official act,” can’t be prosecuted, something.

50

u/Big-Farmer-2192 8h ago

USA is a fucking circus. 

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u/Ill-Mousse-3817 9h ago

Does he really want to choose the war with Iran as a proof of what PLTR can do?

At least pick something where you didn't lose if you need to pump and dump

23

u/jatomozem 9h ago

Why not pick conflict where it was used to target school? What could go wrong.

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u/IvoShandor 9h ago

PLTR is down 3% today (so far).

23

u/gurney__halleck 9h ago

it was down like 8% yesterday too

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u/Inside-Yak-8815 9h ago

Man what the hell is even going on anymore? We have a literal sitting president just casually pumping a Reddit meme stock.

How did it get to this point?

23

u/Important-Agent2584 7h ago

reactionary populism

13

u/johndsmits 7h ago

we hired a user car salesman to be potus and as such:

I GOT A DEAL FOR YOU 🫵 30% off everything sale.

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u/Moon_Rose_Violet 9h ago

Now I’m just a little white collar defense lawyer, not the president of the United States, but if I was outside counsel for Anthropic in its lawsuit against the DOD I would be attaching this as Ex A in a subpoena to the government about certain officials’ holdings in competitor companies 

36

u/Highborn_Hellest 9h ago

Fucking hell. Palantard were not as stupid as initially thought. I remember when it was a memestock

30

u/NoFriendship1771 9h ago

it still is a meme stock bruh

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u/SuspiciousStable9649 no longer flairless just hairless 9h ago

He doesn’t pump as well as sane Musk used to pump.

16

u/Sufficient-Aide6805 8h ago

He’s a struggling apprentice market manipulator compared to prime Musk.

14

u/Big-Farmer-2192 9h ago

OP your meme tags is tripping me up.

Why the fuck is this real.

14

u/R3dFiveStandingBye 9h ago

Bro you can’t save the palantards

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u/roriak 9h ago

Stock dropped 20 minutes before this now it’s turning back

14

u/Dead_Internet69420 7h ago

Just another Pump n Trump

13

u/kingyusei 9h ago

NAH it cant get more manipulatory than this wtf

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u/Rymanbc 9h ago

Really gonna brag about the quality of your Intel when one of the targets it selected for you was a school....?

57

u/EdoTensei10 9h ago

no wonder why it pumped

47

u/footlonglayingdown 9h ago

Pumped? It's down 3% today and down 20% in a month. 

20

u/ExpressionExpert1314 8h ago

I wonder why. Shouldn't a war company be booming during war?

30

u/jamesac11 8h ago

That war was priced in

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u/tgff333 Wary of bears, no matter how cute they are 9h ago

Pltr pump isn't even that strong

7

u/BusyHands_ 9h ago

Till they decide otherwise and then this bitch will cry on national news

Cant wait to buy my ticket to take a dump on his grave

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u/Ill-Bank-1440 9h ago

Not disgusting at all

7

u/zyganx 9h ago

Wasn’t there just an article about the White House warning staffers about insider trading lmao?

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